Fire in Our Voices

Fire in Our Voices

I wrote this song from the perspective of a trans child imagining a future she isn’t sure she’ll ever be allowed to have. Something I thought often as a child. Something that caused me so much anxiety growing up. Though I pulled a lot of this song from my own personal experiences and some of the lyrics straight from my own journals growing up, this story isn’t mine, but something that is very real for so many trans and queer children.

It starts in that place a lot of us know—being seen one way by the world, while quietly knowing something else is true. The song moves through that feeling by letting her imagine what a full life could look like. Not just the big moments, but the ordinary ones too—growing up, being loved, building a life, getting older.

The chorus comes from something I’ve heard said a lot: “you’ll understand when you’re older.” How the adults around us talk through children instead of to them. I wanted to push back on that idea a little. Sometimes people understand themselves much earlier than anyone around them is willing to accept. Caregivers in the lives of children shouldn’t be in too much of a rush to dismiss the experiences and feelings of their children.

The ending shifts perspective. It’s meant to feel quiet and a bit unresolved. For me, the point isn’t to explain what happened, but to leave space for the weight of what was written and what was never fully seen.

I included this song on the record because it speaks to something I’ve experienced, and something I’ve seen in others—the need to hold onto yourself, even when no one else is recognizing you yet.

This song does not yet have a release date. Come back and visit this page for updates.

TR#4: “Fire in Our Voices“

Fire in our Voices

Verse 1

They say my name like it’s not mine
I learned to answer anyway
Somewhere just outside the picture
There’s a girl they couldn’t name
Mirrors never told the story
I was trying hard to see
So I wrote her in the margins
Left a space for her to be

Pre-Chorus

They say I’ll understand when I’m older
That it all will fall in line
But I feel her getting closer
Every time I close my eyes

Chorus

They say I’ll understand when I’m older
Say it like I don’t know who I am
They say I’ll understand when I’m older
But I understand more than they can

Verse 2

Wedding morning, lace and laughter
Mama helping with my hair
Light comes pouring through the window
Like it knows I’m finally there
Father takes my hand and smiles
Says he’s proud of who I am
Every step feels like a promise
Every breath a second chance
Little feet across the floor
Tiny hands reaching for mine
Years go fading into silver
We grow old and we’re still fine

Chorus

They say I’ll understand when I’m older
Say it like I don’t know who I am
They say I’ll understand when I’m older
But I understand more than they can

Bridge

Attendance — hesitation
Wrong name on the page
“Boys to this side”
I don’t move
I heard you in the kitchen
“I’ll grow out of it”
Like I wasn’t there
Like I don’t exist
So I write a little further
Every year I couldn’t say
Just to prove there’s something waiting
Just to keep her from fading

Final Chorus

They say I’ll understand when I’m older
Say it like I don’t know who I am
They say I’ll understand when I’m older
But I understand more than they can

I understand
I understand
More than they can

Outro

She turns the page, the writing changes
Ink goes faint along the lines
Dates just stop in early autumn
No goodbyes, no warning signs
Wedding mornings, borrowed dresses
Growing old in silver light
All the lives you left here waiting
Just beyond our line of sight
She traces every word you wrote
Like it might still lead somewhere
I didn’t know you saw that far
I didn’t know you were already there